Retaliation Penalties

[RichardGraham]

Hi Folks,

Got two retaliation penalties tonight; one in response to a slash, the other in response to an elbow in the head from a 6'4" guy who claimed he did it because I was going to go after him. (That makes a lot of sense, doesn't it? I'm 5'10" max. LOL.)

Anyway, here's my question: How do I stop from instantly retaliating? It's a knee-jerk reaction, and seems somewhat natural!

Anyone got any pointers? I'd appreciate it, because I also had a holding-the-stick penalty and got kicked out of the game for having three penalties. [img]/wtimages/icons/shocked.gif[/img]

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[missionhockey21]

Its just a habit, and all bad habits can be broken if you use self control. But I know what you mean about the knee jerk reaction, if I got hooked/slash/checked I am also likely to retialiate.

[nayrbs]

Definitely a lack of self control. I play games and sometimes I wonder how I come out alive. But think of it this way, if you keep getting slashed then eventually you are going to get a powerplay, and eventually you are going to score that power play goal that makes everything all better. Another way to look at is if you are constantly being bothered by the other players obviously you are doing something right.

-just my thoughts-
nayrbs

[-venom-]

I lead my Men's League Team in penalty minutes

haha it's this damn MLRH making me get all these house league roughing penalties! haha

Usually I wont slash somebody back, I don't believe it clubbing someone with a stick..... a fist feels so much better!



http://www.phatwhippincrx.20m.com/images/dumbass.jpg

[DannyG]

You get my 6 cents on this one (that's 3 times more than 2 cents):

There are three motivations for penalty causing actions;

1. Actions legitimately in the course of play..you were playing hard, and your stick got deflected somewhere it shouldn't have gone...you were really just making the play, but you did (accidentally) deprive the other guy in some way of a fair chance at the play...the ref has to call you on it, no choice...bad luck onyour part.

2. You are dleiberately doing something that you know is punishable, you feel that you must do so, even though you might get a penalty, but you feel you have no choice. Like, to prevent a breakaway in the closing seconds of the game, etc.
You hope the ref maybe doesn't see it, or has put away the whistle, but you take the 2 minutes knowingly if he gives it to you...the Barry Melrose (St. Barry) "good penalty."

3. The penalty in anger...the retaliation...the "peceived injustice penalty." "that so-and-so, I'm going to do to him!!!" When somebody does something wrong, or deliberately dirty, or "deliberately carless," (those clowns who don't seem to care if they hurt somebody else), it is very easy to become angry at them.

The only methodology you have to overcome this is, as others have already suggested in their posts, is your human mind. Animals, who have lesser intellligence, rely on imprinted, inherited psychological patterns of survival behavior: instincts. Humans have these too, but, unlike animals, humans can individual change their imprinting...in udder woids, as a human being, you can change your behavior, by:

1. recognizing it,
2. idenitfying causes,
3. "deliberately, on purpose, by choice," (one of my personal cliches) making a different decision on how to react...

In fact, "choose to respond, not to react..." is the human vs. animal thinking contrast...animals react instinctively, humans can respond thoughtfully.

Rich, you, and anybody else who has this problem, may want to read up on behavior modificatin techniques, but don't get too caught up in it all. I would contend that, in these moments, your probably not having very much fun, and you maybe need to remind yourself why you 're playing the game to begin with...

Please don't look to me for a rigorously successful solution, my response mechanism is to get into shouting mactches. Since I can lose my job if I were to get into a fight, I have to take some nonsense from idiots once in a while, but I really let 'em have it verbally, which isn't a very healthy, happy, having-fun-playing-hockey response, either...

keep at it, try to keep having fun...oh, well...

[missionhockey21]

Its funny what you said in your last sentence, because one of my old coaches always said that if the other team isnt going after you, you are not playing good enough.

[missionhockey21]

It is a lot better to use a fist versus a stick, makes it more... personal

[RichardGraham]

Hi missionhockey21,

Good point. I think you're right about self-control. It's just easier said than done

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[RichardGraham]

Hi Nayrbs,

You're right. If I had just waited it out after the elbowing, the other guy would have had the only penalty, we'd have gone on the power play, and if we'd scored, he might thing twice about the elbow the next time.

Frankly, I don't think I'd have gotten the slashing penalty if not for the bogus holding-the-stick call the ref made earlier. Frustration got the better of me, I think.

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[RichardGraham]

Hi WRBXRioT,

As editor of this Web site, I want to set an example, so I have been pretty good about avoiding actual fights. But I do have to control against instant retaliation penalties, and I've found that I can usually get away with a lot of yapping. LOL.

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[RichardGraham]

Hi DannyG,

My second and third penalties definitely fell under category 3:

The penalty in anger...the retaliation...the "peceived injustice penalty."

I agree with you that I can change my behavior, and I'm going to try.

I don't, however, feel I'm taking the games too seriously. I want to win, sure, but in the preceding five games, I hadn't taken one penalty. I was actually hoping to get through the 10-game season without taking one. Hence my frustration upon receiving what I felt was a bad-call first penalty.

You write: "I really let 'em have it verbally, which isn't a very healthy, happy, having-fun-playing-hockey response, either...", however, I believe that Wayne Gretzky was a notorious yapper. Correct me if I'm wrong

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[DannyG]

you know the hockey gods are getting me back on this one...I have just left the rink, where I reffed a pretty good game, only had to call a single penalty, and on the guy that everybody knew would get one...this was the "game 3, if necessary" game for a semifinal, 2-out-of-3 series, so there was some intensity of competition going on...Everyhting went okay, except that I got into one of those shouting matches with the winning team's goalkeeper, who decided that he was not going to shake anybody's hand after the game...so, I will also try to put my behavior into a more positive frame in the face of the next problem myself...

[Missionskater10]

What I do after I get Hooked/slashed/punched/elbowed ect,ect yadda yadda is get pissed of course but instead of retaliating get the puck and generate a scoring opportunity or even score myself...beat your opponent on the score board not on the head

[RichardGraham]

Hi Missionskater10,

That's definitely what I'd like to do. I've got four more regular-season games (and if we're fortunate, two playoff games) remaining; I'll see if I can't turn this retaliation thing around.

Thanks!

Sincerely,

Richard Graham
Editor
Inline Hockey Central

[missionhockey21]

Your plan needs to be, set the plays up and score, then worry about retalition later, like 4-5 goals up later